What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

I'm Polish.

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

Why didn't Joe catch the baseball? He got shot by a local gang.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

Q: what's your dog's name ? A: Dog.

A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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