what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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lewis=cardiac

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

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Women's Rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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The Labour Party.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops