What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

thumb_up thumb_down -5

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

thumb_up thumb_down -5

you give like i give lomain

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops