kill yourself....with a cigarette

How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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