Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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Barack Obama.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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A man walks into a bar. There is no one there.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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