What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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What's the best way to anger a Muslim? Key his car in front of him.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Nickelback

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Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Why was the butcher bald? He was undergoing intensive chemotherapy.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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