why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

Why are large breasts so awesome? Cleavage is sexually attractive to both men and women

sucks Syntax...

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

What's Pink And Wet? A chewed up piece of Bubble gum.

A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

Reminds me of when I was a teen, I was working at an elderly home, and there was this really really old woman, and she was leaning forward towards me on her wheelchair, one of her hands accidentally near my crotch, I mean this granny was really senile and shit. Then she went all like, you really like it when I touch you there don't you? I mean it was not the best nor the fastest one, but all that excitement "OMG WHAT IF I GET CAUGHT BY A COLLEAGUE WHILE A 89 YEAR OLD WAS JACKING ME OFF!" Really made it all special folks... Especially when I got caught, it was like OMG STRESS ORGASM HOLY DONT CUM NOOOAAAARGHHHH!!!!!! WOHOOOOOO! I walked outta there like a champ, I was like 18 and my girlfriend/colleague which caught me was like, 27, and the next week she was 32, and before you know it, she was 46 on facebook... Thats like you know... Too old or something...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...