Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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kkkk

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops