How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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why did the US nuke japan besause sending chuck norris would be to cruel

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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