Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops