What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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what's white and sticky semen

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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69.

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops