What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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This is a joke.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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