horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

V I T A M I N C !

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

How many men does it take to wallpaper a room? It depends on how big the room is and, to a lesser extent, how wide the strips of wallpaper are. Also factor in variables such as ambient humidity.

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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