Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

Here's a joke for you, my life...

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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