Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Worms don't like apples.

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

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What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

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What looks like Micheal Jackson but isn't Micheal Jackson A black guy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Your ancestors called. They want their glasses back!

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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Why did you chicken cross the road? C u n t.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

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Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops