Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

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Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

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Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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