- Anti Joke

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

Irish sobriety

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.