A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

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you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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"Knock Knock" "whos there" "interupting cow" "interupting cow who" "i have aids"

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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mexicans fishing

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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