Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

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What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

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It's all Taggart

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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