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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

What happened to the white man who beat up the black man? He was arrested for assault and battery. What happened to the black man who beat up the white man? He was also arrested for assault and battery. Their races have no superiority to the law.

what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

POOP.............................................. ITS THE FUNNEST WORD OF ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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