How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

hextech crafting too opieop

How will the world end? That information is unknown

To (down) Below: BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOL! MWAHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHO HEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA... Man I cant breathe! YUCK YUCK YUCK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! AHAHA! HOHOHOHOHOHO HAHAHAHAHA!

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...