Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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