Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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What's long and black? A line at KFC.

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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