Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

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What is red? A rock painted red

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Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

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Prostitution is bad.......

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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the canadian, the chinese man, and the black guy walk into the at different times and buy different things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

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What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

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Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

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I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops