Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped What's worse than being Raped. Being Raped 2 times by a Giant Scorpion.

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What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

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A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

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Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

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What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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