What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

I had 99 problems Solved them all

Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

A horse walks into a bar. "Rough day?" says the bartender. UUUNNNHHHHH!

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

who is not good looking? mon morello

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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