How many lesbians dose it take to finish a pizza? One or unless she invites some freinds over.

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

Penis

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

If a white person and black person have a baby, what colour is the baby? Grey

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

Tony Romo

What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

A gay man watches football.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

Sloths

How does Ron Weasley greet Harry in the morning? Mornin' Horry, how did ghe' sleep?

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...