A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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Enough Red to share, RAWR! With me only though! But hey, do me a favor wear your glasses not your contact lenses. "That anime" do you watch anime? Or hentai or whatever?

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Who Who who? Who who who Who who who who? Who who who who who who who who who who who who who who who…

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Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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why didn't the boy get his soda Because the cashier shot him

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What's brown and Rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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