Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops