Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

What is worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

Whats the difference between a falcon and a deer? both live in water, except for the falcon... oh, and the deer.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

what is 3+3= 8

How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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