How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

24

thumb_up thumb_down +23

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the black guy who was lost in Syria say? "Where am I?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A blonde dies Lololol

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's brown and sticky A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops