How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...