A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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karn chevalier

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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were at work systems r down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops