Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

homosexual

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

You bumder!

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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