I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

A Black man walks into a bar. He then has a drink of Alcohol and walks home to return to his family.

What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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