What noise annoys a noisy oyster? Hispanics with their loud car stereos.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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Q: Why did the man get stabbed? A: I don't know.

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Justin beiber..

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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Albert your flies undone.

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

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- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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what's worse than the holocaust living jews

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What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Poop

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I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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What's worse than being fat? Being gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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