What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

I had 99 problems Solved them all

everyone dislike this

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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