Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

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Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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