What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? names.....

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

What did the man do to the begging orphan on a cold Christmas morning? He kicked him.

The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

Roses are red, violets are blue! Damn, the florist messed up the colors again!

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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