Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I'm sorry sally your grandmother is dead. LOL _ grandpa Laugh out loud!. I can't belive you. I thought it meant lots of love Grandpa-ha funny mistake though right?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

thumb_up thumb_down +6

- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What Did Sally Get For Christmas? A Bicycle

thumb_up thumb_down +6

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops