What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

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So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

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knock knock "who's there?" "boo" "boo who?" dont worry its only a joke dont cry.

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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Do u take sugar?

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

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An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender quickly says to its owner that he must leave as dogs are not allowed in. Upon realizing that it is a seeing eye dog, the bartender retracts his statement and serves the owner a drink.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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I'm a poet and I just didn't realise

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what do you call your mom? mom

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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What happened when they asked Steve if he was feeling blue? He confessed and went to prison for a long time for molesting that poor dog.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a beanch can support a family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops