69 is a number not a sex poshion

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing, but he did purchase whiskey with the little money he had to drink away his misery, and to suppress his suicidal thoughts that were a result of his alcoholism which stemmed from his father's abusive nature.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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rarw

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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24

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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No.

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A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops