When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Connor is homo

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This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

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Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

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What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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Why did the guy die. He OD on drugs

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

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What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

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You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

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How old are you? 7

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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