Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

8===D ~ ~ ~

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

why did the guy make a deer and and bear mix because he wanted some beer

How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

what's worse than getting cancer.........nothing cancer is a pretty bad thing

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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