What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

what did the computer say to the tv? computers are not living there for they cannot talk

Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

haha

Yo mama so old, she might die soon

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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