A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

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Sometimes i'm hungry.

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

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Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

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What's so funny about losing the game? Nothing.

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The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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Wats do you get when you combine a vampire and a ginger? Idk, who would pull that disgusting shit

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One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops