What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...