How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

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Why do monkeys fly with their wings? Because Elephants tend to run out of battery.

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Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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Q: When do u know when your sister is on her period? A: Your dads dick tastes funny.

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A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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