A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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a man was shot.... he died

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whats 2+2? math.

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

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so... how about that airplane food

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Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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