Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

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how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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Your dads dead. lol

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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Bob Saget that is all

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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what do you call a young man? a little boy

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women's rights, lol

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Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops