A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Get it? More.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

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How did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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What does a gay horse eat? Other gay horses.

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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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