Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

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how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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ecks! why zee?

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

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hi mom

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops