why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

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What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

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What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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Your momma is so stupid your momma forgot that jesus did exist and has been proven by historians to have existed

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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What did the white guy say when a black man punched him? Ow, i am sueing for assault. that is a crime

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops