i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

A man walks into a bar He says "ow" and promptly sits down and ices the bruise he sustained

Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

What did Delaware? A coat.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

whats brown and booky a book.

What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

What's brown an sticky Shit

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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