I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Knock knock" my mom says not to talk to strangers!"

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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drew edminstin is a rat

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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who ate all the food in zimbabwe? Nick bigg.. he later died of cancer and aids

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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